I feel as crazy as Daemon this week.
With the helping hand of a Paddy Considine cameo, Daemon (Matt Smith) finally tips over the edge this week. Apparently, having a sex nightmare about his own mother wasn’t enough of a sign for the Targaryen prince to turn his life around. Neither was a visit from his dead brother. Daemon is losing House of the Dragon fans faster than Ser Criston Cole (Fabien Frankel) this season—and it may have something to do with the fact that our uncle-husband no longer supports his queen.
First off, he (rather confusingly) blames Simon Strong (Simon Russell Beale) for the hauntings. Correct me if I’m wrong, but Daemon watched Alys Rivers (Gayle Rankin) brew her entire mystery potion in episode 3 before he drank it without question. “Someone tried to poison me,” he tells her. Um…yeah, Daemon. She did. Am I missing something here? “Maybe it’s the swamp air,” he continues. Is any of this real? I feel insane!
Outside the castle, Jason Lannister (Jefferson Hall) approaches with a caged lion. He declares that his army won’t march on Harrenhal until they’re joined by Aemond (Ewan Mitchell) and his dragon, Vhagar. Aemond wants Harrenhal badly, however—even though he argued with his brother about it in episode 4 before nearly burning him to death. He took Rook’s Rest instead of marching on Harrenhal, which Cole reminds him nearly lost them his entire army. Aemond orders him to march anyway. They believe that Daemon is amassing men in the Riverlands, but he’s far from it, actually. He’s just going absolutely bonkers up there.
And the Emmy for Best Animal Actor goes to…
Aemond Attempts a Faster Mad King Speed Run Than Daenerys
There’s a food shortage in King’s Landing. Not only has Aemond made the city a prison, but the new king is also hosting feasts as his people starve. The random wayward townsfolk each get a brief update. Ulf (Tom Bennett) complains about his dirty soup, and Hugh (Kieran Bew) pets Cheese’s dog before stealing a bag of food. Meanwhile, Aemond plays with his giant marble. Larys Strong (Matthew Needham) approaches him—which is never good. Despite his clear insanity, Aemond is the first character who is smart enough to tell the little weasel to fuck off. “I’ve little patience for flatterers and lickspittles,” he says.
He orders Larys to send for his grandfather, Otto Hightower (Rhys Ifans). If you recall, Otto took off for Oldtown after Aegon II (Tom Glynn-Carney) made Cole his Hand. He never returned. What is Otto up to over there? There hasn’t been a single response to any of Alicent Hightower’s (Olivia Cooke) letters. Gwayne (Freddie Fox) hasn’t heard anything from his father, either. Instead, we learn a bit about Alicent’s youngest son, Dareon. “He’s ten-and-six now,” Gwayne says. Please, Gwayne, just say sixteen. He also uses words like salubrious, though, so he’s too far gone to speak like a normal human. At the end of the day, we’re talking about a guy named Gwayne. It’s almost worse than Ulf. “Dareon’s clever,” he continues. “He’s skilled with a sword and kind.” Kind? That’s good, I guess! “Kindness is a quality I’ve found lacking in his brothers,” Alicent says. It must suck to hate your kids.
HBO
It’s nice to see a normal pair of siblings, for once.
Speaking of Aegon, the king is awake. He’s still Two Face–esque and covered in burns, looking like he fell off a roller coaster and broke every bone in his body. “His Grace sleeps nine hours of every ten,” the Maester says. “But he did open his eyes and speak, however briefly.” Sounds pretty bad! Swiftly, Aemond greets his brother and presses on his wounds with his big stone marble. Finally, some action for those marbles that House of the Dragon repeatedly shows us. Under duress, Aegon claims that he doesn’t remember the battle at Rook’s Rest. Truth or not, it’s a good play.
Aemond then dismisses his own mother from his council, telling her to return to her “domestic pursuits.” He seeks to make a truce with the Triarchy so that they can properly fight Corlys Velaryon’s (Steve Toussaint) blockade, but everyone reminds him not to trust pirates. He isn’t old enough to remember that crab guy.
HBO
This week, the marbles become weapons.
Rhaenyra’s Army Grows, for Better or Worse
At Dragonstone, Corlys formally accepts his new position as Hand of the Queen. He also names Alyn (Abubakar Salim) as his first mate. For some reason, Alyn isn’t pleased. “Don’t want my men to get the wrong idea,” he tells his brother, Addam (Clinton Liberty). “The Sea Snake would rather have High Tide claimed by the sea than call us his sons.” Damn! You just reveal it like that? Cat’s out of the bag now, everyone. Meet Alyn and Addam, Corlys’s bastard sons. As much as we love the Sea Snake, it seems Corlys was unfaithful during his life on the waves.
In the Vale, Rhaena (Phoebe Campbell) keeps Rhaenyra’s (Emma D’Arcy) tiny sons company. (Like I said last week, we’re down one Rhaenys but not one Rhaena.) She spots a charred area outside the castle, full of burned sheep. When Rhaena asks Lady Arryn (Amanda Collin) if there’s a dragon in the Vale, she confirms that it’s untamed. Based on his prey so far, my money’s on the wild dragon named Sheepstealer.
HBO
Corlys Velaryon’s secret revealed!
Turns out this is a dragon-centric episode. Ironically, it’s rare for a show titled House of the Dragon but welcome nonetheless. As Rhaenyra’s Council of Nobodies take their seats, they’re introduced to Ser Steffon Darklyn (Anthony Flanagan). He’s a member of Rhaenyra’s Queensguard—and if I’m not mistaken, the nephew of the lord whom Cole beheaded in episode 4. After going through Dragonstone’s various scrolls last week, it seems that Rhaenyra’s basically come up empty-handed. Makes sense to me, because there’s no way any Targaryen lord wrote down all of their bastard children’s names on paper. “Your grandmother’s grandmother was a Targaryen princess,” she tells him. This guy? We’ve never even met him until right now.
So it doesn’t surprise me that he is burned to a crisp the second he tries to ride Seasmoke. Frustrated, Rhaenyra slaps one of the useless old fools on her council. Jace later tells us that his name is Lord Bartimos Celtigar. (Pause to let that insane name sink in.) He’s apparently Rhaenyra’s Master of Coin (played by Nicholas Jones). I don’t know if any of these guys matter, but I’m taking stock for you anyway.
Theo Whiteman//HBO
Maybe Rhaenyra would feel better if her room were a bit brighter.
I…Honestly Saw This Coming
Back in Rhaenyra’s chambers, she meets with Mysaria (Sonoya Mizuno) once again. As I struggled to figure out what her character’s path was last episode, I had a simple thought: Are these two about to hook up?!? At the time, I swept it aside. But I should’ve worn that idea on my chest, because Rhaenyra and Mysaria kiss this week. Since all they ever talked about was how they’re both Daemon’s exes, their lack of Bechdel-test awareness really kept me from figuring out how Mysaria was going to make herself indispensable moving forward. After she uses her network of spies in King’s Landing to sway public opinion like an army of Twitter bots, her usefulness is more apparent this week. It’s also worthy of a kiss.
Her plan is a bit confusing, but Mysaria manages to have someone sneak past the blockade and ship food to King’s Landing. The starved city riots in support of Queen Rhaenyra. Townsfolk surround the church while Alicent and Halaena (Phia Saban) pray inside. Then the situation gets dangerous. When a man grabs Alicent’s arm, one of her knights chops it off with his sword. The man screams and falls to the ground. It’s chaos. Alicent and Halaena barely escape.
Addam also flees for his life. Seasmoke chases him—and it almost feels as if the dragon is singling him out. Maybe he can tell that he’s part Velaryon! Once again, I wish that they could talk. Rhaenyra and Mysaria are about to get it on when they’re interrupted and informed of Seasmoke’s return. But who is his new rider? As Rhaenyra takes off on Syrax to confront him, Jace (Harry Collett) makes an Arthur fist from the sidelines. He previously tried to comfort her with a line that could’ve easily come from Katy Perry’s crazy new “Woman’s World” song. “My ruler is my mother,” he says.
Now he’s pouting for the camera. In the end, maybe the war will come down to whether Jace or Aemond is the king of serving face this season.
